Tuesday, October 11, 2011

The Greenlake hole: pedophilia or affordable housing?

Another, half serious, comment on the Greenlake yuppie neighborhood of Seattle.

Folks in Greenlake sure love their kids, as is documented by the parenting styles in Clare Dederer's book "Poser", and some prankster recently put up a proposed land use sign on the huge fenced in hole off of 72nd that outlining his (or her) ideal of what that land could be used for (from My Greenlake.com"):

"The sign, a parody of a Seattle Department of Planning and Development land use sign, indicates that the empty lot will be used “to construct one ground level ball pit pond containing 1,200,000 cu. ft. of rainbow plastic balls.”

“Parking for for 171 bicycles, 65 unicycles, and 13 tricycles to be provided in 2 levels within the structure,” the sign reads. “Existing ramp to be converted to one 40 ft. slide.”

A map on the sign shows a trampoline, a concessions area and a “rescue claw.” "

Man, someone out there really loves kids. Besides being a little creepy, it shows where the focus of Greenlake residents are: the hole could easily be used for affordable housing or other worthy causes, but instead our prankster proposes a place that will give even more opportunities for the spoiled brats who live in the area, kids who already get more attention and money lavished on them than has in most of recorded history.

Will the ball pit include a resident Santa whose lap kids can sit in, who will listen to requests for further goods that the kids want to accumulate? Better check the sex offender registry before hiring for that one.

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